Peter Pinkerton - Can I help you, sir?
Manfred McFarland - Yes, please. I'm interested in buying a house.
P - Ah! You've come to the right place, then, sir. Please, take a seat!
M - Thank you. That's very kind of you.
P - Now, sir. What sort of house are you looking for.
M - Well, I'm rather interested in a two-bedroomed house, so friends can come to stay. I'm a rather sociable person.
P - I see. So, where are you living at the moment.
M - Well, I’m staying in the park at the moment.
P - The Park. A wonderful place. I stayed there with my good, lady wife the first night of our honeymoon. Many years ago now, of course. Ha, ha. What elegance! What style! But, are you moving here from another part of the UK?
M - I’ve come from the north.
P - The north! I love the north. I have an aunt who lives in Leamington Spa… So you’ve decided to move to Bournemouth. A wise choice. Very quiet, Bournemouth. I'm sure you'll be happy here. Eh… it’s rather warm in here, isn’t it? Would you like me to put on the air-conditioning?
M - Actually, I’d rather you didn’t. I’m feeling a little chilly.
P - I see. Can I get you a nice cup of hot tea?
M - I’d prefer coffee rather than tea.
P - Certainly. Monique! Could you bring this gentleman a coffee, and I’ll have an iced tea.
Monique - I’ll be right back Mr Pinkerton.
P - Now, sir. If I may take a few details. Your name is…?
M - Manfred, Manfred McFarland.
P - I see. My name is Peter Pinkerton. You can call me Peter. May I call you Manfred?
M - I’d rather you didn’t.
P - Of course, Mr McFarland. As you wish. Now. I rather think it would be better to show you some properties on my computer screen, or would you rather I took you around the town to see some places straight away.
M -I’d rather see them on the computer first. I rather like the area near the sea.
P - Ah, ah! Rather more expensive, of course, Mr McFarland.
M - I’d rather live near the sea than in the city centre.
P - Rather! Wouldn’t we all, Manfred! Ha, ha, ha!
M - I said I’d rather you called me Mr McFarland.
P - Of course, of course! I’m so sorry. So you say rather than a flat, you’d prefer a house.
M - That is correct.
P - With a garden?
M - Of course. I’d rather spend time outside than be indoors all day. It’s what I’m used to.
P - Aren’t we all! We British love to be outside among the flowers or attending to one’s vegetables. Do we not?
M - Eh, yes.
P - So, how much were you thinking of spending?
M - 450
P - Ah! 450 thousand. I think I have some properties for that price… Rather luxurious ones too.
M - I said 450.
P - Yes! That’s what I understood. 450 thousand!
M - No, 450 pounds.
P - What do you mean 450 pounds?
M - That’s what I have to spend. It’s my life’s savings!
P - But, but, Manfred!
M - I said I’d rather you called me Mr McFarland.
P - But… but… you said you were staying in the Park Hotel. The Park Hotel costs at least 450 pounds just for one night!
M - No, I said I was staying in the park. The public park. I sleep on a bench there.
P - On a bench! You mean you’re a vagabond! A tramp!
M - I’d rather you called me Mr McFarland.
Monique - Here’s your coffee, Mr McFarland. Nice and hot!
P - Monique, Mr McFarland is leaving this instant.
M - May I just have the coffee? I’m feeling rather thirsty!
P - Leave my Estate Agents this minute!
M - I’d rather you didn’t talk to me in that tone of voice. I haven’t even finished my coffee. Come to think of it, I rather like the iced-tea too. Monique, do you have any cake? I’m feeling rather hungry, but anything would do. Half-eaten sandwich? I’m rather fond of food out of the bins. etc.
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